Just a Little Piddle

Alright friends, so as promised I am posting funny stories of my childhood as a series called Throwback.
So here's embarrassingly hilarious story of Marika's childhood number one.

I think I was in the third grade when this happened but it followed me for years after. My school was about forty-five minutes away from my house. I remember the third grade as being a hard year for me. I had moved from a first, second, third grade split class to a third and fourth grade class. The teacher was strict and hard to please. I remember this day so vividly, I remember what the stinking weather was like.

So, I'm sitting in my new class room, taking a spelling test and suddenly I get the urge to go to the bathroom. I calmly put up my hand and the teacher snapped "No questions during a spelling test!" So I sat there a couple minutes thinking that I could make it a little longer. A couple moments later I raised my hand again, feeling that my bladder was about to EXPLODE and I would die, I got the same response. This time as a last ditch effort I called out, "I need to pee!!!" She told me that I needed to wait until after the spelling test. I don't know if this test was like being graded by the Queen of England or the President of the United States but this was important spelling test. Apparently it was imperative that I learn to spell 'because' at this exact moment so that I could write out the next thing that took place.

Because... My teacher would not let me march my little booty to the washroom and I was bursting at the seams I PEED MY PANTS. In the middle of 23 kids I straight up peed in class. It wasn't like just a little piddle it was like the flood gates of heaven opened up and buckets of pee were splashing underneath my tiny third grade desk. My teacher yelled "Why didn't you go to the bathroom?!" "Well ma'am, I was a little busy riding elephants??...Wait, no it was definitely because you wouldn't let me go!" All the kids in class were killing themselves laughing and I ran out of the room. My school was so far out in the boonies that it took my mom almost an hour to bring me some new pants and then take me home from school. I sat in my pee soaked pants for almost an hour while I cried big embarrassing crocodile tears in the office.

People wonder why I am so messed up... This is probably why. I was a traumatized little kid. I hope your childhood was more pleasant and less pee filled than mine, but if it wasn't, I am sorry. I sympathize with you deeply.

I also peed my pants in eighth grade, but I am NOT ready to talk about that.

Goodnight my loves.